I found the strangest place to buy books I love for parents, Joseph E. Bank, yeah the preppy suit store--please don't turn me in to all my cool fashion police friends who I keep swearing to that I am weaning myself off of Talbott's Ann Taylor etc. It hasn't exactly "taken" yet. Anyway these books are my new legit cover. My top 3 picks are:
The first two are both pocket size and chock full of quotes and advice that should make you think, laugh, and weak in the knees. If they don't you are a cold person and this blog can't help you, nor do we want your kind :)
The third one is not exhaustive which is what makes it great. But has lots of great tips on how to raise a kid with good manners without seeming stuffy. It also is good because you get a sense that it focuses on the real critical stuff instead of nit picking.
I hate to sound old-fashioned, but you really do your kids a great service in making sure they are polite. It will cause them to sail easier through life and get lots of positive feedback from other parents, teachers, and coaches, only reinforcing their self-esteem.
You have to Practice what you preach and the best way to instill any type of habit or value in kids, friends, or strangers is to lead by example.
I still think Emily Post (the updated version) is the best one out there. It has a great index which makes it easy to search in a pinch. It teaches you how to make proper introductions, address letters, entertaining, office politics, dating, and is very helpful with special events (weddings and the like). It is exhaustive and covers anything you could need to know about manners.
But again, no need to go through and dog-ear all pages relevant with notes in margins on how to augment. Only yours truly should have a dork factor quite that high. I don't mind sharing this inside info as it already brought over a year of hazing, when at my first job, at a law firm, it was discovered hidden behind other books on my bookcase.
Now some who know me I am sure are either rolling their eyes because they think I need to loosen up, while others will say, Flavia the picture of propriety, I don't think so?! I have seen that girl eat a cheese steak, and it ain't pretty. Also, even though I know there are better ways to express myself, swear words fly with causal ease with me when sports or driving is involved. I do however refrain from swearing in front of kids and grandparents and their friends (though I know some 80 yr. olds that make me blush!)
I have a sister who just turned 18, Kelsey, and she has just graduated to every once in a while hearing her "sis-sis" drop an S bomb, as she calls it. She would not dare swear in front of me and if she is reading she better not get any ideas!
Here's one to throw you. Sometimes not practicing good manners is practicing good manners. I am not being a spin zone pundette here, stick with me.
Manners are to make people feel comfortable and to be gracious. There are times when not practicing manners do just that. For instance if you are at a basketball and decide you want to eat your food the way Emily Post's suggests not only will you look like a moron you will also make others feel bad. Go ahead eat that hot dog like a slob! Never hold your good manners over others to make them feel less than, that is the ultimate rule of manners in my book.
Comments (1)
Although unmarried and zero kids it wouldn't hurt for me to look through those books. It's never too soon to "train the trainer" and although there are no little feet to pitter patter around my house, I'll consider it a smart investment for the future.
Posted by: JD on April 11, 2006 18:29